Honest Trailers: Disney Movies
by Guy who writes good stuff
Summary: Read as your favourite Disney movies are mocked, joked about, and made fun of in journalist trailer format! I just hope this is legal on the site. Rated T because i'm paranoid. Honest Trailers created by ScreenJunkies. I don't own Disney.
1. Chapter 1: Lady and the Tramp

**Wassup family? I just finished The S.H.I.E.L.D Falls and it felt goooooooood! I have weird hobbies. For example, I enjoy making up YouTube sketches and stuff like that that will never, ever make it online. So, as a substitute, I'm laying down some of my ideas for Honest Trailers (originally made by Screenjunkies) for Disney movie. . I'll start with this one.**

This Valentine's day, prepare to relive Walt Disney's interpretation of a novel that set the standard for uninspired writers, filmmakers and fanfiction writers trying to make love stories…Nicolas Sparks.

Lady and the Tramp

Meet Lady, an adorable, wealthy belle, by dog standards of course, who is the centerfold of a rich couple's attention ..until the wife gets pregnant.

Meet Tramp, a street-smart stray playa whose family is non-existent.

When these 2 find each other, he will eavesdrop on her, exaggerate everything, and not care to look behind him while they're escaping together. What a great boyfriend.

When Lady's owners go on a trip to somewhere we never learn, Lady is left with the worst baby/dogsitter ever who will; wake up the baby by screaming, let her cats roam free without getting permission from the owners of the home, leave the baby's window open during a lightning storm, and let Lady run away and not give 2 sh*ts about her. Real smart choice, Darling.

When Lady is saved by some random mindless street dogs, Tramp will teach her the glories of street life like; sneaking into a zoo, chasing chickens, and getting caught and taken to a pound. Why does he call her a pigeon?

A film that will teach you all that all it takes is 15 seconds and a rat to solve your relationship problems, and that if a dog barks three times after being given a menu, you should give him spaghetti.

Prepare to relive the horrible Italian stereotypes, the annoying howling, and the teeth whistling.

Starring; Bane (Lady), Taylor Swift (Tramp), Scooby-Doo (Trusty), Scotty from Stark Trek (Jock), the Olsen Twins (Si and Am), Slender Man (Jim Dear), Ke$ha (Peg), Ripper Roo (The Hyena), and the Star of the next movie (Scamp at the end).

Lady and the Tramp. How adorable.

**Thanks for reading. Make sure to review and add it to your alerts. Honest Trailers were originally made by ScreenJunkies, and I don't own Disney. Review telling me what Disney Movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer.**


	2. Chapter 2: Lilo & Stitch

'**Sup homies? I have gotten a request to do Home on the Range…and I'm not gonna do it. I'm saving it for later. Anyways, here's my next one.**

This Summer, get ready to relive the Disney film without anything that really makes it stand out.

Lilo & Stitch.

Meet Stitch, the 626th illegal genetic experiment created by a fat alien scientist with too much time on his hands. He is bulletproof, fireproof, can see in the dark, climb walls, lift things ten times his size, is almost impossible to kill, and has an instinct to destroy anything he touches. Also cute and fluffy.

Meet Lilo, a disturbed, stupid little girl with a family more broken than the Jackson 5. Her hobbies include taking pictures of fat people, and attempting voodoo. (Shows her saying "My friends need to be punished.")

When Stitch crash-lands on Earth after spitting his way out of a high-security galactic spaceship, Lilo will adopt him, thinking he's a dog. A blue, big-headed, black-eyed, bipedal dog. *groan.* However, Stitch is being hunted by his creator, Jumba Jookiba, and his completely useless assistant.

In order to evade capture, Stitch will blend in by; drinking coffee, throwing things at people, picking his nose, ruining everything, breaking stuff….lots of stuff, and acting like a complete jerk every chance he gets.

Prepare to relive; the grass skirts, the mosquitoes, the polygonal spaceships, the destruction, the A113 license plates, the more destruction, and Lilo's stupid dialogue.

Starring; An evil Koala (Stitch), The little girl from E.T. (Lilo) Timon and Pumbaa (Jumba and Pleakley) Will Smith (Cobra Bubbles) David Hassel Hoff (David) The Almighty Tallest (Grand Councilwoman) Jaws (Gantu), and A Hawaiian lady (Nani).

Lilo & Stitch. I still don't know how everyone thought he was a dog, I mean, come on.

**Thanks for reading. Make sure to review, and tell me what Disney movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer.**


	3. Chapter 3: Aladdin

**Good day, or night, depending on what time you're reading this. I'm glad you guys actually give a sh*t about my stuff. Anyways, here's the next chapter.**

Prepare for the Disney movie that squeezed over $200 000 000 from the pockets of moviegoers everywhere.

Aladdin

Welcome to the Arabian city of Agrabah, a town with a great marketplace, and the dumbest lawmen and Sultan ever.

Meet Aladdin, a funny, likable, smart, clever loser whose biggest problem is that everyone wants to kill him.

Meet Jasmine, an attractive, rich princess who dresses like a belly dancer. Her biggest problem is that daddy's selective with her boyfriends.

When Aladdin is tricked by Jafar, this evil, creepy, old, trusted(?) advisor to the Sultan, who wants a magic lamp so he can rule the city, Aladdin must descend into the Cave of Wonders with his annoying monkey sidekick Abu, and get the lamp.

But when Abu touches a big gem he was told not to touch, Aladdin, Abu, and a magic rug are trapped in the cave. Aladdin rubs the lamp to find out that it holds Robin Williams, who has the powers to; make you trip out, make as many pop culture references as possible, and turn Aladdin into a lying asshat.

Prepare to relive; the skimpy outfits, the horrible Indian stereotypes, the pop culture references, the blatantly stated themes of the story, the more pop culture references, and Gilbert Godfried's voice.

Starring; Prince Abubu (Aladdin), Princess Peach (Jasmine), Gene Hackman (Genie) Michael Jackson's Monkey (Abu) Maleficent (Jafar) Good Shere Khan (Raja) and Polly Pocket (Iago)

Aladdin. This one was good, kind of hard to be honest about it.

**Thanks for reading. Make sure to review telling me what Disney movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer. Sorry if this one's not too good, this movie was awesome.**


	4. Chapter 4: Atlantis : The Lost Empire

**Hi. Read and enjoy. That is all.**

Prepare for the reliving of the Disney movie that nobody loves but everyone likes enough to watch if they have it on VHS

Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Watch as this mild-mannered nerd, who is obsessed with Atlantis for some reason, is mocked by old rich dudes.

But when he's given a chance to find the ancient city he's longed for, he'll go on an expedition manned by the worst crew since Prometheus.

A selfish captain who leaves his crew to die.

A lazy demolitions expert who has no respect for ancient monuments, and forgot to bring extra dynamite.

An underage mechanic, with violent tendencies.

A crazy excavator who is scared of soap, yet keeps a collection of dirt.

An idiot cook who does not know what lettuce is.

A lazier announcer, who takes personal calls during the million-dollar mission.

So far the assistant to the captain and the doctor seem like the only ones suitable of being on this mission.

Watch this crew's journey of driving, traveling in submarines, climbing, digging, and even falling.

Discover the Atlanteans, a noble people with hot princess who are attacked by the crew soon after they arrive. Never seen that before, native people getting attacked by outsiders. Kind of cliche, really.

Prepare to relive the tattoos, panicking, the architecture, the impossible robotics especially in a film taking place in the early 1900's, the explosions, and the impossible translation skills of Milo.

Starring Four-Eyes (Milo) Earth Neytiri (Kida) Ranger Rick (Rourke) Sex Appeal (Helga) Joseph Stalin (Vinny) Shaqille O'Neil (Sweet) Danny DeVito (Mole) Merle Dixon (Cookie) Black Dumbledore (Atlantean King) and Mickayla from Transformers in she were less hot (Audrey).

Atlantis: The Lost Empire. Milo is STILL a mild-mannered nerd.

**Thanks for reading. Be sure to review telling me what Disney Movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer. And spare your reviews saying I'm racist. I was joking about the king's beard.**


	5. Chapter 5: Lady and the Tramp 2

**Hello everyone, so sorry for the delay. I was on vacation. Anyways, I decided to write this while it was still fresh in my mind. Either way, enjoy.**

From the production team behind Aladdin 2: The Return of Jafar comes the less-than-stellar sequel to the first movie I did an Honest Trailer on.

Lady and the Tramp 2: Scamp's Adventure.

The sequel that will make you wonder: This is in the same timeline?

Lady and Tramp's son Scamp has a life with a family, food, shelter, and safety, but he wants to live out on the streets where he's in constant danger from dog catchers, cars, and other dogs.

His dad will criticize him for this and leave him in the doghouse, where he will sing a completely out of the blue musical number, before getting out of his leash...somehow.

But to survive on the streets, he'll need some help from this random puppy he meets, Angel. A street smart and tough-ish pup whose purpose in the movie is to be Scamp's motivation for going onto the streets, Scamp's conscious while on the street, Scamp's motivation for going off the streets, and the love interest of the protagonist.

But when Scamp's daddy finds him during a picnic, Scamp must make the ultimate decision: A nice, comfy home, or a dangerous life with the douchebag doberman Buster, and considering his decision-making skills, you can probably guess which one he picks.

Marvel at the lack of Lady and the Tramp throughout most of the movie, and all the characters that serve little to no purpose like Scamp's 3 sisters, the Junkyard dogs, and Jock and Trusty, that are just carry-overs from the first movie. Prepare to relive the cheesy musical numbers, the carried-over scenery, Scamp's idiocy, the more cheesy musical numbers, and the cheesy sad parts.

Starring: Cramp (Scamp), Lindsay Lohan (Angel), The Situation (Buster), Charlie's Angels (Scamp's Sisters), Taylor Swift (Tramp), Not-Bane (Lady), Scooby-Doo (Trusty), Scotty from Star Trek (Jock), and the Hulk (Reggie).

Lady and the Tramp 2: Scamp's Mistake. It's still a better love story than Twilight. Maybe that should be its new tagline.

Lady and the Tramp 2: It's still a better love story than Twilight. Much better.

**Thanks For reading. Make sure to leave a review telling me what Disney Movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer. The more I get, the more motivated I am.**


	6. Chapter 6: The Incredibles

**Wassup family? Now, to be honest I'm not using many suggestions because I've already come up with ideas. So don't get angry when I don't use your suggestions. Either way, enjoy.**

From Disney and Pixar comes the movie that Disney used to show Marvel they could make superhero movies.

The Incredibles.

Meet Bob Parr, a huge business man who lives a double life as Mr Incredible, a super-strong hero with the most clichéd costume ever, and the dumbest disguise since Green Lantern.

But when the government passes a law that bans superheroes from doing anything, Bob is forced to be only a humongous business man, and live a lame life as a father and husband. Riveting.

BUT when he gets fired from his job after sending his boss through several walls, he is given a second chance to be a hero by a very shady lady, and forced to fight the Omnidroid: AKA Generic Movie Robot #341.

However, the Omnidroid is being controlled by Mr. Incredible's biggest challenge yet: Syndrome, a cocky, snotty, villain with the most clichéd origin story ever, who messes up while monologing not once, but twice.

But Mr. Incredible's not alone, he's calling in backup: Elastigirl, a very "flexible" housewife who steals the movie by looking at her ass in the mirror.

Violet, an emo, angsty, invisible teenage shut-out who can project force fields as well as turn invisible, which is ironic because she's anti-social, I see what you did there, Pixar.

Dash, an over-confident, disobedient, bratty show-off whose biggest problem up until this point is that his mommy won't let him go out for sports.

And Samuel L. Jackson, also known as Frozone, who is...uh, well, Samuel L. Jackson.

And film that will make you ask questions like: How did the supers get their powers? Are they mutants, or did they fall into vats of toxic waste? Or, oh, Bud Luckey's got a role?

Prepare for everything you would expect from a superhero movie like, family drama, explosions, exercising, explosions, a weird talking smart person, explosions, and did I mention explosions?

Starring, Captain America (Mr. Incredible), El-ass-tigirl (Elastigirl), Bella Swan (Violet), Sonic the Hedgehog (Dash), Nick Fury (Frozone), Cortana (Mirage), Phil Coulson (Rick Dicker), J. Jonah Jameson (Mr. Huph), Brad Pitt (E.), and a carrot (Syndrome).

The Incredibles.

Oh, and, thanks for the cliffhanger Pixar. We're all looking forward to that "sequel".

**Thanks for reading. Make sure to review telling me what movie you'd like to see as a Disney Honest Trailer.**


	7. Chapter 7: Alice in Wonderland

Based on a book by Lewis Carroll, Walt Disney Pictures invites you to a world of wonder, enchantment, and insanity.

Alice in Wonderland.

And family picture that will have you asking: "WTF am I looking at!?"

Meet Alice, your average everyday blonde-haired, blue-eyed, beautiful screwup. When curiosity kills...not her cat, she falls down a rabbit hole while following a white rabbit with a giant watch...ugh, already I feel mindf*ucked.

After she falls down she...meets a talking doorknob...shrinks through the lock after literally crying a river...meets a dancing dodo...and you know what, if I keep going, I'll sound crazy. Some really warped sh*t happens.

Experience the magic of LSD as a cat defies physics in every way possible and cookies and drinks change Alice's height drastically. No, LSD definitely has more logic.

Revel in the pointless song sequence of the singing flowers that go from singing to Alice to shooing her from the garden in mere seconds. Bask in the glory of the pointless song sequence of the card guards, who have worse painting skills than a drunken monkey. Be sure to appreciate Alice's voice, which make's Dorothy's singing sound youthful.

Prepare to relive the world's craziest tea party, game of croquet, set of birds, and the trippiest chase sequence you'll ever see ever.

Make sure you prepare yourself for the ultimate twist of all time...it was all a dream. What a rip-off.

Starring: 13 going on 30 (Alice), Mr Mylptlyx (Cheshire Cat), Bizarro Bugs Bunny (March Hare), Future Johnny Depp (Mad Hatter), Dumb and Dumber (Tweedledum and Tweedledee), Queen Latifa (Red Queen), Uuuuh... (Caterpillar), Popeye (Dodo), and Piglet (the White Rabbit)

Alice in Wonderland.

Yeesh... at least they didn't make a sequel out of this.

**Thanks for reading. Be sure to review telling me what Disney Movie you'd like to see as an Honest Trailer. Or just review for fun. I love reviews.**


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